- Today is Garbage drop off day; then off to pick up the mail from the post office. As my phone is at 19%, I check the charging connections in my truck before leaving. No connection. I search in vain for the second charger. NOTHING IS THE SAME in the truck since we took everything out to have it serviced. WHERE DID IT ALL GET PUT?? Why don't I remember?
Back inside the house to find another charger. Back outside to the truck to find that one doesn't work either. That's when a plethora of sayings flood my mind, along with a vision from long ago where I see myself walking away from it all....illogically trudging down a road headed West, with all the cash I have stuffed somewhere on my being, never to return.
The first saying that haunted me was "The straw that broke the camel's back."
I've heard that since I was a little girl, marveling at how something so tiny could cause a huge beast to crumple. Yet that is how I was feeling. Not finding a working charger so my phone will function on my trip to and from town was that straw.
It came on top of opening old mail today (that was unopened due to weeks of dealing with my husband's near death). The two letters both said the same thing....each one of my businesses was in jeopardy of being closed because the franchise tax forms had not been filed last year.
Quick panic call to my tax person, who realized she filed an extension but never finished the job. HER PLATE WAS FULL, TOO: family health issues, the incumbent political party changing all the tax rules so she was studying day and night to be able to do her jobs, ETC. (Lots of straws piling up in her life.)
As I looked at my reactions about the nonfunctional cell phone chargers and the tax forms that had only 5 filing days left in order to conform, I reflected on the rest of the burdens I'd born through the past year: my sons being shot and tortured in Mexico while heading for a fishing trip and the months I dedicated to their healing; the business I had to help run when one son suffered a nervous breakdown and needed 6 months to recover; the attention required for my mom and her health; and oh so many other large and small issues. I saw I was currently living the feeling that there was no room in my life to cope with one more thing, no matter how tiny. My brain was full. There was not enough space left in the gray matter to find the key I had in my pocket just yesterday; to find the driver's license I didn't put back in its rightful place; to find the book I journal in.
Little everyday things were turning into gargantuan time consumers complete with emotional traumas and teetering into creating total life resignation.
Then the memory of Lady Master Natasha's words "You're not in 3D anymore" came rushing in. I've heard them quite often for over a year, but only today, when I was the camel and that tiny last straw was placed on my back did I grasp the power of those words.
3D was all about limitations. That included all of the following common 3D sayings:
"You can only do so much."
"That's pie in the sky."
"Throw up my hands in despair."
"Pull my hair out.
"I've had it!"
"Not gonna take this anymore."
"My plate's full."
"If this happens one more time....."
Third Dimension's heaviness (like gravity) kept so many of us weighted down and unable to cast off the yokes that burdened us.
But.....WE ARE NOT IN 3D ANYMORE!
So what does that mean?
One thing it means is I CAN EXPAND MY CAPACITY TO COPE, and to do so with ease, joy, and grace (or whatever other options I choose.)
I am not little Lynea burdened under the trials and tribulations of everyone else's disasters, unable to take care of my own needs and slowly sinking into incapacity.
I AM THE GREATER VERSION OF MYSELF, FREED BY VIOLET FIRE AND BY REALIZATION, THAT HAS ALREADY EXPANDED MY CAPACITY TO COPE BECAUSE I AM NOT LIMITED BY 3D ANYMORE.
It took me only that moment of recognition, and all the heaviness vanished. I insisted on being an expanded version of myself, able to handle more, remember more, and think more while doing so within the glorious vibrations of upward spiraling emotions. I have currently chosen ease, joy, and grace.
I envision myself expanded, as though I were a giantess. No little issue has the power to crumple my HANUMANEA self. (Look up Hanuman. I have simply added my childhood nickname to it and visualized myself expanding in power and humor as did Hanuman.)
Why not let TODAY, THIS MOMENT be the moment YOU TOO expand your capacity to cope? The world is not the decider of your destiny or of the way you handle your moment. YOU ARE.
Welcome to part of the miracle of this new dimension WE ARE ALL IN TOGETHER.
It's another day in the paradise of our making.
POST SCRIPT: Here is an immediate update.
When I finished sharing the above, I left the pc on while I went to take trash and pick up mail before the time window allotted was over. I noticed my thinking was very orderly and clear.
I was first in line at the dump site.
At the postoffice, I left the mailbox key IN the mailbox while I went to pick up packages, with my arms already overflowing with the mail literally stuffed into my box, BUT I NOTICED I DIDN'T HAVE THE KEY within 10 steps! In addition, there was more mail that I had missed inside the box.
My HANUMANEA self was kicking in!
As I needed a large pushcart to carry my packages, I left the loaded cart outside the post office, taking only the smaller packages to the truck and putting them in the back seat. As I turned around to go back and get the very big box, it was walking my way, carried by a man smiling beneath his black cowboy hat. He even returned to put the cart back inside for me!!
WOW. That was new!
15 minutes later, at home unloading packages, I noticed one was wet. It was the only one whose arrival really mattered to me because it was health related. NO FEELINGS OF SINIKING INTO THE GROUND APPEARED. Instead, I immediately called the number on the package, was the first in line (again) with no waiting (so no listening to horrible music with countless others waiting in an invisible que), and had the broken bottle that had leaked all over the packed mailer AND bottle box was credited back to my account.
How painless was that?????!!!!!
Wondering how best to dispose of the bottle, I carefully opened it inside a big bowl, only to discover it had leaked during transit due to expansion or weather and it wasn't broken at all.
Why is this part of my new coping self? Because normally I don't open my mail or packages right away, putting them off til later when there is nothing more exciting to do. Mail always felt like one of those 'camel straws' to me.
May your remaking of yourself be as quick or quicker!!!